Heaven
by Ser o no ser
Summary: My take on what happens during and after the second-to-last time that The Doctor sees River alive. Two-shot and kinda fluffy. The Twelfth doctor as played by a ginger Benedict Cumberbatch.
1. Part 1

Hollow, that's how the Doctor felt. His chest felt cold and empty. He was on autopilot. He didn't want to think, not until he got to his final destination. If he thought, he wasn't sure if he'd make it. The only part of his brain that he let function knew how to fly the Tardis. Any other day, that wouldn't have been enough but, it's as if she knew the gravity of the situation. She was so easy to fly, a human could do it.

The Doctor, in his twelfth form, had just given River his old sonic screw driver through tears. The ginger kissed his wife's forehead before wrapping her hand around the metal tool. Choking back a sob, he told her that he loved her and that he'd see her soon. She had asked for an explanation but all he could say was, "Spoilers." She just nodded and hugged, him trying to comfort him as best she could.

The Doctor stood comatose at the controls, his trade mark black waistcoat unbuttoned and his duster thrown over the railing. He wore black slacks and a dark teal button-down with it this time. She'd recognize him instantly.

With expert timing, the Tardis landed exactly as the other Tardis departed. The Doctor threw himself out of his ship with great determination. A few of the people he'd saved had started to greet him but quieted when they saw his unfamiliar face. He wouldn't have said anything to them anyway. There was only one person he wanted to talk to at the moment.

He'd 'saved' his consciousness to the Library's mainframe which took a bit longer than he'd hoped, partly because of the vastness, partly because of his distress. He stayed patient, though. He'd see her soon.

He came to be in a field of deep red grass. Gallifrey. He knew it was just a digital recreation from River's memory but it made him feel happy as well as sad. He saw River sitting on a hill not too far off. There she was, in all her beautiful glory. The Doctor expected to feel better at this point but he didn't. He needed to hold her.

She stood up and the Doctor could tell she was grinning. She took a few lazy steps toward him, her white sundress billowing behind her. She walked slowly but at the same time, the distance between them shortened. Soon she was in front of the Doctor holding his hands in hers.

"Hello, Sweetie," she greeted before standing on the tip of her bare toes to kiss her husband.


	2. Part 2

**Sooo... how mad at me would you be if I said I wrote this chapter on the same day as I wrote the other one; I just happened to forget to upload until now... hypothetically, of course. Also, I usually don't write fluff pieces, or read them. All the same, I still feel like this is the fluffiest of fluff. So fluffy, I almost didn't post this story. Sickeningly so. But whatever; there's enough drama and sadness out there. Life is short and you are hot. **

"Hello, River." he blushed, despite being married to her for hundreds of years.

"You know I love it when you do that." She grinned when he blushed even deeper. "You look _exactly_ the same."

"Yeah, well, I just saw you 15 minutes ago." He smiled sheepishly. With a tug of his hand, River got them walking at an easy pace, "You know, River, this is the first time that we've synced up ever. We've experienced everything together already."

"I know." She stroked the back of his hand with her thumb and leaned her curly head against his shoulder.

River could hear the frown in his voice. "You don't seem that excited."

"You know I love you, Sweetie. There's no need in saying that. I just don't want to see yet." The Doctor stopped abruptly and pulled his hand away from hers. She smiled at how sensitive and serious this form was.

"I don't understand," he said. His face was stoic but she could see the hurt in him, all of it. She suddenly wished she had been a bit gentler.

"Yes you do," she said putting a hand on his shoulder. He didn't even react to it.

"No, I don't. You're my wife and we can spend the rest of our lives together here. Yet you tell me you don't want to see me?"

"You don't want to understand." She sat down in the grass and the Doctor sat next her automatically. "I get it. I wouldn't want to go on without you either."

"I don't have to. We're right here together." He was still refusing to look at it logically; he even saw it in himself. He felt like a child but he didn't care.

Doctor, you have the rest of the generation and another to live and I don't think the universe is ready to be without its last Time Lord yet."

"The universe will survive without me," he said. He was staring off into the mountain ranges now.

"Doctor, I can't let you abandon the rest of your natural life to be with me."

"You don't _let_ me do anything," he said angrily. Any other time, River would either be hurt by his tone or offer a rebuttal but she knew it was his defense mechanism. He only lost his temper when he found no other way to achieve his goal.

"Doctor, look at it as if we switched places. You wouldn't let me throw away the rest of my life."

"I just did, actually," he said, referring to what his tenth form did.

"Stopping a paradox is not the same thing. Would you rather have never met me?" He didn't say anything for a minute; he just looked in the complete opposite direction of River. She thought he was going to get mad again but when he turned around, there were tears running down his high cheek bones.

"It's not fair, River! I lose everything I have. I lost my old family I lost your parents and if I go now, I'll lose you, too. I'm tired of losing."

She put her arm around her considerably taller husband and he leaned into the embrace. "Oh, Sweetie. You forget what you've gained. You've gained love, family, friends and experiences even the other Time Lords could only dream of. And yes, if you leave now, you'll lose some more but you'll also gain." The Doctor and River leaned back in the grass and stared at the orange sky.

"I can't adventure anymore; I'm stuck here. Go adventure for both of us. Go save the worlds time and time again. See the universe. Solve mysteries. Go get a hundred more companions and kiss each and every one of them like you always do."

"I do not kiss all of my companions," he said. She could hear the blush in his voice and laughed.

"Oh, please. You've kissed my mother, my father, my grandfather, Jack Harkness that man with the spaceship for a second story…"

"Ok, to be fair, Jack, Amy and Donna kissed me."

"Details," she said with a wave of her hand. They laughed and then fell into an easy silence. It was almost as if nothing had changed.

"Do you see, Doctor? Do you see why you need to go on? You'll have new memories like this that we can share. And if it makes you feel better, as soon as this form of you leaves, an old, decrepit version of you in his thirteenth form will likely land the Tardis as soon as you leave and join me."

"Decrepit? Well that's a bit harsh..."

She laughed. "Sweetie, you're halfway there now," she teased.

"Well what does that say about you, then?"

"It says I married a wonderful man that I will love even when he is sick and bedridden."

The Doctor didn't say anything; he just let the silence fall over them. It happened a lot in this form. It was nice.

Eventually, the twin suns began to rise. River shifted under his arm and the Doctor knew that his time with her at this point was coming to an end. That hollowness that had never quite left him returned. His subconscious had known from the beginning that this was the way it had to be; he just wanted to pretend like it wasn't true.

"I love being with you; you know that, but I think it's best that you leave soon. You're only delaying the future you from getting here." Despite her words, she snuggled deeply into his chest. The Doctor smiled at her behavior that was at odds with her words. He nuzzled her curly head.

It was nearly half an Earth day before either of them were as ready as they could be for what had to happen. The last ten minutes they just stood in an embrace saying nothing nor moving. On the outside River was adamant but on the inside she was afraid. What if he died before he could come back? If he left the Save File but an older version of him didn't return? The very idea almost made her change her mind. She had to be stronger for her more sensitive Doctor; they were foils after all. She needed to help him despite wanting to take him to her virtual home and never let him go.

She had to expedite this goodbye or it wouldn't be a goodbye at all. She pulled away from and buttoned and straightened his waistcoat.

"Ta-Ta for now, River," he said. He seemed surer about this now. She was glad because she wanted to break.

"See you soon, My Love." She held his hand as he dematerialized, waving her fingers through the after-pixels. "See you soon."


End file.
